Where do we go from here? Culture and healing using a regional lens
If trauma can be passed on, so too can wellness
"To me Courtney's Allies is a potlach to Courtney's life, a celebration of who she was and a way to use our grief to bring hope to the lives of others."
Independence Day: Measured by days before and days after
July 4 has always been one of the happier American holidays, a day of celebration, a day to remember the day our country broke free from oppression. It is one marked by bright fireworks, yummy food, and a fun, lighthearted atmosphere, but on July 4, 2018, that all changed for anyone who knew Courtney Gaboriault. What once was a day to look forward too, is now a day filled with heartache and dread. A day that will forever be changed and one that has forever changed so many lives. I think I speak for all of Courtney's Allies when I say that July 4 has become a day that is now largely measured in days before it and days after it. There were the days before the 4th, when even as late 20 somethings who knew the injustices of the world, it seemed like everything bad we encountered could be fixed or rectified and now there are days after the 4th. Days when sometimes nothing seems certain and a time marked by feeling like every day on Earth is one we are thankful to have been given, even though it is one more we have had to live without our friend. Courtney's Allies was initially formed as a platform to remember Courtney in a way that she would be proud of. A way that is characterized by spreading wisdom and helping others , a way that is synonymous with making things better than we found them. However, for many of us, the group has become a cathartic community that has helped us heal our own hearts. It is hoped that we can use what we have learned and what we continue to learn every day to help others heal from trauma. We do this through offering a community of support specifically related to Domestic Violence to anyone who needs it.
Understanding Trauma
The easiest way to describe trauma to readers is to describe it as being stuck in a constant cycle of flight, fight, or freeze. Long after the triggers of trauma have alerted those who have experienced something traumatic, they still feel it. Trauma is like a thief, it sneaks in when you least expect it and even after it is gone, you still feel the effects, but just like a burglary it isn't something you can readily see that has been experienced just by looking because people often wear their scars on the inside. Victims of domestic violence experience the same sort of trauma that one feels when they experience any adverse event in their life and they do so feeling the same sting of uncertainty and fear. The only way to help someone deal with trauma is to recognize it, understand it, and rally around the person in their time of need through offering resources that can be of assistance to them. As I mentioned in a previous post, I live in Alaska and using the culture of the region has been incredibly helpful for me in understanding the effects of trauma and how we can assist victims of domestic violence, feel loved, supported, safe, and valued after such a traumatic experience specifically through practices related to community.
Healing through Native Culture
Living in Alaska is not easy. It's cold here, it's dark here, and suicide and domestic violence occur more frequently here than in any other state. Alaska Natives are no strangers to hard times feeling the effects of substance abuse and suicide at an even higher rate than other groups who reside in Alaska, but this means they are not strangers to healing or resiliency either. When examining some of the cultural practices the Natives have in place to deal with grief and ways to bond through community, it becomes easy to see why Courtney's Allies has already been so helpful to many in Vermon and why it will continue to be a source of hope and a beacon of light to all who encounter it.
Potlach
A potlach is a native tradition of celebration. It is unique in that it is not relegated to just one group of Native Alaskans and can be found throughout many communities in Alaska. A memorial potlach is a celebration that involves an entire village. It is a process that has the goal of grieving the life of a deceased loved one for a year and healing as a community through this process leading up to a day of planned celebration and remembrance. During a traditional Athabascan memorial potlach, for a year after a loved one has died, community members plan a memorial service. They get through hard times together and on the day of the potlach, they let out all of their fear, grief, and anguish. After the potlach, they move on having given these feelings back to the Earth. They are not able to do this without leaning on each other and being open and transparent about their feelings. Courtney's Allies is a potlach to Courtney's life, a celebration of who she was and a way to use our grief to bring hope to the lives of others. If we do our best to use those in our community to lift each other up while simultaneously using our strengths to bring awareness to domestic violence, we will have done something Courtney did every single day, make the world better.
Tea Partners
Tea partners are another native tradition rooted in community. Native elders recognize that there are seasons we will experience in our lifetimes that we will need someone to help us navigate through. Tea partners are two people who are paired, one old and one young who exist solely to help each other out. The elder provides food for the younger person and the younger person in turn helps the elder out with things they need done around the house. It is the goal of Courtney's Allies to be a tea partner to whoever may need one and to provide the same comfort and assistance with resources that tea partners provide to each other.
Our goal
We are here to provide you with education on and resources to discuss domestic violence. It is our goal to make it easier for people to have conversations about domestic violence so that if something seems like it needs to be addressed there is no question on what to say, what to do, and who to go too.
Comments
Post a Comment